your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
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is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
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Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
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