you guys were way drunker than both of me
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂