is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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