I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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