ugly people sure do ruin things
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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