distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
