He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
