Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
