I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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