sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
