don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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