I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
