I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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