You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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