if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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