i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Randomize
