watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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