I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
