I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Randomize
