I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
