I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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