i think my tv is drunk
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize