one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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