just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
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