Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
