The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
