cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
