Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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