South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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