the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
