it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I'm really busy with my period
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