you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
