Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
