So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Randomize
