When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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