i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
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I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
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I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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