i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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