I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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