this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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