i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
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