It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now