I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
