i can't believe i had my finger in that
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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