if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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