fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
