no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
