Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
