i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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