Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize