So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I have post one night stand depression
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