i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize